Fearless Fox Friday!

I posted not that long ago on my Facebook page about my depression and it got a lot of response. I decided to repost it here to give it "a space".

Fearless Fox Friday!

My father committed suicide when I was 15 years old. It was beyond devastating to me and my family. This was not my first exposure to suicide, I don't know what was. But when I was in 8th grade I went around saying one day that I was going to kill myself when I got home from school. No one took me seriously or maybe nobody was listening, except my friend Suzi. She made me come home with her that day and talk about what was going on with me. I'll never forget her care and kindness.

Depression is a disease. It doesn't care that you are rich, successful or a parent. It's not something that goes away or takes a day off. The darkness is always there. On your bad days it makes sense and on your happy days, it drives you insane. It's calling for you, waiting for you to put your guard down long enough to get you.

It's a thought every day. Mostly fleeting because it's so common. I don't talk about it because it scares or makes one uncomfortable or you get accused of making excuses or being dramatic or too sensitive. People like what they can fix. You can't fix me. Only I can learn more and better ways to manage and quiet the voice. I hate when people say "It's just one day" it's my whole life, or "just think happy thoughts" I do.

Looking at me you might think, I'm a happy person and have lots to be grateful for. I am, and I work hard every day to be so! It's very possible to make life easier and even enjoyable. I have learned a way that works for me. If you are interested in how? Please contact me. If you or someone you know is looking for tools like that? I will help!

Fearless Fox Friday!

Expiration dates. Do you follow them? Do you pay attention to them? Might you follow when it comes to milk, but not when it comes to mascara?

Fearless Fox Friday!

I've been thinking about expiration dates because I've been de-cluttering and organizing my home. So many things have an expiration date. My lovely organizer helps me to let go. I put such value on everything that I've bought that I don't want to let it go even if it's gone bad or is no longer effective. We've thrown away medication, baking powder, and chocolate! Most of the time I don't think about effectiveness or quality of a product.  I just think, I have it and I don't want to buy more.

Do we do this with our lives?

This is also a question I have been asking myself.  Do I hold on to emotions and feelings longer than needed? Do I keep myself in situations that are spoiled? Do I look at the effectiveness of my thoughts? Do I keep labels way after they are stale and no longer true?

How often do we put a value on the pain or time we have put into something above what is most important? Our dreams, our happiness,  our peace, our ability to move forward, these are the things we could be valuing.

What would happen if we all decided to throw it all out? All the expired thoughts, feelings, and excuses. All the self-doubt, judgment, and worry. Who would we be? What could we do?

If you are ready to get cracking, join me! I'm ready. Together we can clean house. We can go through and find all those rotten thoughts, stale judgments, and ineffective feelings. We can let go of the expired stuff holding us back! We can move forward and Hatch!

Let's Hatch and be Rock Stars!

Contact me at letshatch@gmail.com

Fearless Fox Friday!

I have been talking lately about how I have let go of labels and ways of thinking about who I am. Let me go further with that thought today.

Fearless Fox Friday!

I grew up in a family where my position was the 8th girl and soon followed up 4 years later by the long awaited miracle only boy. Because of this, my little heart took on thoughts and feelings about myself that were untrue.

I felt invisible, second best, a disappointment, and unwanted. Later I took on being too small to be capable of doing anything on my own or knowing anything for myself.

As I continued to grow I took on more labels. With choices that I made, I made them define me. I took on lazy, stupid and ugly.

I wore these labels with shame. I tried to hide "the real me" away, hide her from view. I developed a face for the world that I thought it would like better.

I was funny and always said yes and tried to please and keep everyone happy. I failed at this impossible task over and over again. This would be evidence of the truthfulness of the lies I was telling myself.

I was a great collector of evidence. Every time I was looked over, forgotten, or put down it was further evidence to the lie. I constantly compared myself to all those around me. I felt as if I could never measure up. For awhile I gave up, I almost tried to be the negative image I had. To my detriment that just created habits that were hard to break later, and only really affected myself. I also tried to be the good girl. That became isolating and lots of pressure to hold up to a certain standard.

This last year and a half or so I have taken on new experiences, I have challenged myself to the max, and I have tried new tools like EFT in my battle against fear. I had to accept that I had felt these things and thought these things about myself. I had to be okay with the fact if they were true. Then I had to get to the truth. Not someone else's version of me, but mine alone. Who was I going to be going forward? Who was I going to accept into my life now? How was I going to see me, and love me? I started taking care of myself. I started doing nice things for myself. I started caring about me.

I feel like I have hatched into more of who I really am. I have let go of the labels and started to embrace the "real me". This has been a painful process at times and a liberating one too. I have felt great sorrow and great joy. I was ready to really examine my life, and I am willing to do the work.

Does this speak to you? Can you relate at all to my story? Do you feel lost in the lies that you have been taking on as truth?

If you are ready and willing to do the work, then let's get cracking! Let's start to find those labels you have and challenge them! Let's Hatch into Rock Stars!

Kelly Fox
Letshatch@gmail.com

Fearless Fox Friday!

I made a statement on Facebook recently that I was no longer going to live a half life. It was my declaration to the "world" that I am no longer going to play small. I was asked shortly after what did I mean by this statement? Well here is a further explanation of what I meant and how I am going to try to live.

Fearless Fox Friday!

When I hear the term half life I geekily think of the moment in the Harry Potter movie where one character explains the effects of drinking unicorn blood, My life is much less dramatic but it's a visual for me. I feel like I live a life of indecision and waiting. I feel like I am constantly holding my breath and my body is always on high alert. I'm powerless to make changes or make my life the way I want it. That I merely exist to fulfill someone else's desires or expectations for my life.

Now I have made steps toward changing this about myself. I feel like I have challenged a lot of labels and untruths that I have told myself for a long time. Maybe lies that I have held onto for my whole life. I have taken steps to shine and show who I am. I have walked away from small incapable Kelly and have tried to embrace powerful capable starlet Kelly. Some days are easier than others.

Back to my statement. I am vowing to live a conscious, mindful life. One of choice and passion and purpose. One without compromise to myself. One that makes me proud of myself and is determined by me and not others. A commitment to myself. Action on the things I am prompted to do. A life of getting up and doing. No more seeing things as impossible. Finding a way to make all of it happen, even if by myself. Learning the things I need to know to move forward where I haven't been able to. Continuing to challenge the lies of my fear and past. Loving myself more than ever before!

It won't be easy, but I'm kind of tired of easy. My anxiety is coming up already. I can do this. I am capable. I am strong. 

If my journey sounds similar to you or resonates with you? Email me and we can do this together.

Let's Hatch

letshatch@gmail.com

Fearless Fox Friday!

Fearless Fox Friday!

Desires, wants, dreams can often get stuck in the land of expectations. Either the expectations you have of yourself or others stops you from moving forward, taking a risk, or making a decision.

What can you do to move forward? First, we must be aware. Aware of what you are wanting really, free of judgment. Aware of what you are expecting from yourself and others. Aware of your willingness to make different choices.

Now that you are aware, the ball is in your court. You have the power and you get to choose to create a new life or experience for yourself. The sky is the limit. What will you do? If you would like support in figuring that out? Contact me. We'll get cracking.

Let's Hatch

Fearless Fox Friday!

What are the silent contracts you have going on?

Fearless Fox Friday!

We all have silent contracts. We have them with ourselves and others. They keep us in waiting mode, or frustrated, or feeling lazy and unaccomplished. Which is never a fun place to be.

We might get stuck in our head with negative thoughts like, "I can't depend on anyone, but myself" or "This person is such a flake, they don't care about this." When that could be completely not true.

Or we can get stuck in our feelings of feeling worthless or unlovable. Telling yourself, "I can't do anything about this, they have all the power" or "no one loves me or cares about me enough for them to take action, not even myself."

So, are you asking, "What can I do to change?" Great! Because that is the first step. The next is to express what those silent contracts are. Write them down or have an open conversation with the person who you want them from. Tell people what you want or need from them. No one can read your mind. Sometimes not even yourself. Get clear on what it is that you want and start going for it! Asking for it! Getting it!

Need help figuring all that out? Contact me. I can help you out. We'll crack through that shell and get to what it all is.

Let's Hatch! 

Fearless Fox Friday!

What are the silent contracts you have going on?

Fearless Fox Friday!

We all have silent contracts. We have them with ourselves and others. They keep us in waiting mode, or frustrated, or feeling lazy and unaccomplished. Which is never a fun place to be.

We might get stuck in our head with negative thoughts like, "I can't depend on anyone, but myself" or "This person is such a flake, they don't care about this." When that could be completely not true.

Or we can get stuck in our feelings of feeling worthless or unlovable. Telling yourself, "I can't do anything about this, they have all the power" or "no one loves me or cares about me enough for them to take action, not even myself."

So, are you asking, "What can I do to change?" Great! Because that is the first step. The next is to express what those silent contracts are. Write them down or have an open conversation with the person who you want them from. Tell people what you want or need from them. No one can read your mind. Sometimes not even yourself. Get clear on what it is that you want and start going for it! Asking for it! Getting it!

Need help figuring all that out? Contact me. I can help you out. We'll crack through that shell and get to what it all is.

Let's Hatch!